OFF GRID. ON THE MOUNTAIN.
UNDER THE INFLUENCE
(of nature)

Welcome to the steepest homestead in New Hampshire. Home of the lightweight gobbler and handmade farm goods.


(Don't worry, the turkey is sober now.)

THE LEGEND OF THE TIPSY TURKEY

It started with a wild plum tree and a bad decision. One crisp autumn afternoon, we mistakenly fed a bucket of *slightly* fermented plums to the barnyard crew. We thought nothing of it. "Free snacks," we said.

The goats? Totally fine. They have iron stomachs.

The chickens? Just clucked louder than usual.

But the Turkey? Oh, he was a different story.

We found him stumbling sideways, gobbling at a fence post, and generally having the best afternoon of his life. He was absolutely hammered. He wobbled for an hour, took a long nap, and woke up with a headache. And thus, the Drunken Turkey Farm was born.

"We don't sell the turkeys. They are family (and terrible drinkers)."

MEET THE SUSPECTS

Funny Turkey Face
THE LIGHTWEIGHT

Name: Beepbeep
Crime: Public Intoxication
Sentence: Community Service

Goat Eating
THE ENABLER

Name: Billy
Crime: Eating the evidence
Sentence: Head scratches

Basket of Plums
THE WEAPON

Item: Fermented Plums
Danger Level: Tasty but risky
Status: Hidden

HANDMADE NH FARM GOODS

Authentic handmade New Hampshire farm products.
www.drunkenturkeyfarm.com  |  drunkenturkeyfarm@gmail.com

Maple Syrup

NH Maple Syrup

Tapped from trees that have seen some things. Sweet, sticky, and 100% legal.

See Sizes & Prices →
Coming Soon
Goat Soap

Goat Milk Soap

Smell better than a wet goat. Handcrafted with love and stubbornness.

See Details →
Eggs

Farm Fresh Eggs

Laid by the loudest chickens in New Hampshire. Free range and full of personality.

Order Now →
Bird Feeders

Bird Feeders & Homemade Bird Food

Handmade feeders with homemade birdseed that won't melt in summer — and chipmunks and squirrels won't come near it!

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Dried Herbs

Dried Herbs

Grown and dried on the farm. No pesticides, no nonsense — just good herbs.

See Varieties →
Firewood

Fire Starters

Handmade wax starters. Because starting a fire shouldn't be harder than raising goats.

Campfire season is here. These firestarters will get your fire started in no time and give you more time to spend making Smores and memories.

See Prices →

GET IN TOUCH

Have a question? Drop us a line!

drunkenturkeyfarm@gmail.com